So I know I am not the only one that has ever felt this way. It is almost 1 am in the morning and I am crying not hysterically. I signed Jackson up for preschool 2 days a week so he could get some quality social time in and because I can’t wait for him to start talking. I have a feeling this will help a lot with his speech. We were going to a mommy and me daycare and Jackson got picked on too much. The bad outweighed the good so I think he is done with that place which was free, Hell Yeah! So if it was free and not worth it there had to be some pretty bad things about that place and it was mostly I felt like I was surrounding Jackson by a couple children who were much more aggressive than he was. Jackson didn’t know how to react to the pushing, hitting or to the toys being thrown at him. He would nicely give back the toy to the thrower and smile. Thats my boy. I really don’t want his innocence to go away. He has been my best friend for 2 years and then some and tomorrow. I am leaving him and he might cry all day. I know the people who are watching him and they have 1 other two year old and 2 four year olds. He is completely loved there or it seemed that way when I went by.
Tonight I forgot all the reasons why we were going to take him there. It is mostly for social reasons, I want him to be able to trust other people and I want him to have the chance to parellel play with other kids. He is learning more and more at home everyday. I don’t think it is necessary to send him…..
Uggh and I told my husband that during one of the days I would be like a real housekeeper and fix our house. I have about 8 loads of laundry sitting on my dining room table waiting to be put away and probably 5 more loads after that… I know good moms have dirty ovens and sticky floors, I totally agree with that but thats how my house gets to point of no return. I am not at the point of no return yet. I could just coo at my 3 monther tomorrow. Screw cleaning, Oliver has been squealing when he laughs, it is so infectious. Time is flying for this family and I can feel change happening.
I am awaiting it, I am praying for it. We have everything we need, we are happy we have each other but we don’t feel right here.
findingmyfootinginlife 